I am in awe that we will have a 9 month-old next Christmas. Oh, how different life will be! The nearness of this great life change is feeling very daunting to me. Not because of all that needs to be done, or because of the fear of labor, but just knowing that life will be massively different, I know I don't even know the ways in which it will be different.
My knees are shaking and my throat is a bit dry as I stare right in the face of an inevitable mysterious change, without knowing what it really is or means. Baby girl is due in 84 days. That means the delivery "window" is 70-98 days. Gulp.
This, I think, is one of the problems with waiting so long to have babies. Hubs and I are very used to us. To our marriage the way it is. To choosing what we do and when. To our house and the way we live in it. Every Sunday night, we have our church small-group over, which includes 20 people - half of which are kids. The kids ages range from 1.5 yrs to 18, and all but two of them are boys. They are loud, and very active. Their parents apologize for the chaos, but I am thankful. I think we need some chaos training in our home. We bought a home to fit a family, and I really want a big family, but that doesn't mean I'm used to the chaos it brings! Every Sunday we invite people over for chaos training.
Today, I painted my nails red to feel a bit prettier. I feel like a whale, and while I know that I have the pregnancy "glow" and am the picture of maternal beauty (or so they tell me!), I don't feel very pretty. To me, whale = fat = not pretty. Red nail polish always helps. At the same time, I finally took off my horribly chipped toe-nail polish that has been on since September. There was barely any left on anyway. I figured I'd better take it off while I can still reach my toes (barely).
3 comments:
I was going to leave this comment before actually reading the post, but all the more reason for leaving it after reading it. I was just thinking how pretty you were looking in those photos! Pregnancy is suiting you very well!
Keziah x
I don't know you personally, but you do look beautiful in the pictures. Have your husband paint your toenails!! That's what I did - well, 3 out of 4 times (just never got around to it the 4th time).
I wandered over via Rocks in my Dryer. We're planning a trip to Uganda later this spring. Could you share a packing list with me? My husband went last year but I'd appreciate a woman's perspective!! We'll be staying in someone's home so it won't be out in the bush or anything. We're also taking our less than 1 year child. :)
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