Sunday, March 12, 2006

Sins of the honey-nut variety

Today I suffered from my lack of preparation, which I consider a terrible sin. I'm not being sarcastic here. It bugs me so much when I'm feeling the effects of my own lack of preparation...I really, really hate it. If I had just been more prepared, whatever it is, wouldn't have happened.

I have been so drama-queen busy the last week or two (which means I'm probably not as busy as I feel like I am), that I have not really bought food. If I don't buy food, no one will. We've been eating out a lot. I've had several different breakfast options, but I've been eating my way through each one. The last couple days, I've been left with who-knows-how-old honey nut cheerios, kept fresh from the miracles of tupperware. I know that I can't JUST eat a cereal like that (non fortified with uber amounts of protein and fiber) for breakfast, and still feel fine later that morning. My body just can't do it. So, I don't know if I was thinking..."Hey, I'm BUSY, surely my body and insulin levels will understand this for me!" Anyway, I had my cereal around 8:00 and around 11:00 had a major crash in the middle of church service. I was so hungry and was really focusing on not getting dizzy... just making it through till lunch. I wanted that full loaf of communion bread SO bad! I took an overly large portion and just hoped the Lord would forgive my communion selfishness.

The problem after service was that we had lunch plans with one of my husband's co-workers scheduled for 1/1:30ish, and we don't know her super well, so it's not like we were going to pop in and chow down. Church was done at 11:30 and I could not imagine waiting, let alone talking politely to someone first. We went to subway and got me a sandwich and him a couple cookies. YUM! Then we continued on to lunch and ate way too much at the co-workers house.

I felt so stupid for eating two lunches. I KNOW I can't eat a bowl of honey nut anything and then make it all the way to lunch time without eating the arm off someone next to me. I don't know why I try to test this limit every now and then. So, in the midst of trying to loose weight (which didn't happen this week, thanks to my stress induced complete lack of self-control last week), I ate TWO lunches today. This is a highlight (or would that be low-light?) of negative consequences.

I'm going on a work trip, followed by vacation in a week. I'll be gone for two weeks. Self-selected eating will be very challenging (even if I get to pick, I don't know the ingredients or how things are prepared), and exercise will be challenging. I'm trying to plan now (in all my free time!) so that I don't go blood-sugar crazy or spend two weeks completely sweat-free. My natural inclination would be to be a little bit anxiety driven...eating chocolate and ice cream and avoiding real exercise.

Hopefully the sick feeling I felt all afternoon today will be a good reminder on my trip to make healthy decisions throughout the day, especially at breakfast (ie need something more than pastries and frothy coffee)!

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